I Guess You're Going to Miss the Panty Raid
by merryfortune
Summary: [Crack] A strange item is left behind in the boys' change room. Kink shaming ensues.


**I Guess You're Going to Miss the Panty Raid**

 **[AN: I can't believe I am naming a fanfiction after a fucking Spongebob Squarepants quote.]**

'Who the hell left this behind?' Miyaji asked as he pointed to the offending article of clothing. He scrunched up his nose in disgust. Anger flared in his eyes. He took a sharp breath when he realised he wasn't going to get an answer for his question. He tried again but more forcefully. 'Who the fuck left this behind?'

There was a moment of silence and again, no one replied. The silence was pregnant and everyone glanced at one another. Slowly, tension rose because there was no explanation for why the garment was lying there, slightly tossed aside and completely forgotten about. Well, logically, there was an explanation as to why the garment was there but there wasn't anyone to propose it.

All eyes were on the garment. It was just a pair of underwear. Too bad it was spectacularly unusual otherwise it would have just been tossed at whoever looked as though they would wear underwear that size.

This underwear was highly different to the previous pairs that had been accidentally forgotten in the chaos of showering after practise and suchlike. This pair looked like it would belong to someone female given the shape, colouring, and extras. It was a light pink in colour with lace along the hemline; complete with a tiny bow. It looked as though it would be perfectly natural in a lingerie catalogue.

Kimura glared. He swallowed. He summoned every inch of courage he had inside of him. he really wish someone else would say it but right now, everyone else was too stunned silent out of embarrassment: sympathetic and real. 'Just playing devil's advocate...' he drawled. 'But does this mean someone has been having sex in the change rooms?'

His question came down like a tonne of bricks on everyone in the room; including himself.

Silence permeated the room again. Intense staring at the panties and at each other ensued. Nobody gave a single hint as whether or not it was them.

Takao squirmed. He was fighting really hard not to double over in laughter. There was a rock in the bottom of his stomach. He hates everything but he has to conceal it all. A faint shade of red was in his cheeks. Nobody questioned it. Everyone was red in the face as they had just come from practice after all. Unfortunately for Takao, he knew exactly why those pretty pink panties were lying in the corner neglected.

Shin-chan was a lucky bastard. Maybe he did it on purpose. He had left early after all; so he could go get some shiruko. _Likely story_ , Takao thinks to himself bitterly. His eyes can't leave the panties. The scene keeps replaying in his head like some cruel taunt. This is the most staunch Takao has ever been. The most focused he has ever been. This is the worst he's ever felt. His knees are going to give out soon and he's just going to roll around on the ground in manic laughter and die from exhausted lungs.

 _This is pushing the boundaries, Shin-chan_! Takao takes a deep breath and a long, slow blink. He has to get everything out of his head but he can feel it bubble up in his throat, from the deepest pits of his self, he can feel laughter try and escape him. He tries to swallow it and for a little bit longer, Takao manages to maintain a facade of ignorance.

'Can someone please just own up to it.' Ootsubo begs. 'How about this: someone own up to having sex in the change rooms and we'll keep it to ourselves. No one has to know. We take it to our graves.'

That was a tempting offer. 'Ha.' Takao squeaks and suddenly all eyes are on him. Takao would feel less threatened at knifepoint. He swallows and his eyes bulge. _Fuck my life_ , Takao thinks to himself as he pointedly stares into the distance; beyond all his teammates and the bullshit he has to put up with. He starts to crack under the pressure. Suppressed chuckles erupt from the deepest parts of his lungs.

Takao laughs nonstop for a good five minutes until he doesn't have any breath left. Until his vision is bleary from happy tears. No one tries to stop him. if anything, his teammates are impressed that he managed to keep quiet for so long. Takao was not known for being able to resist immature jokes and laughing at anything even remotely funny. Naturally, his teammates knew that when he tired himself out that there was going to be an amazing story behind it so they just waited.

The upperclassman circles around Takao who had brought himself to his knees from his laughter. He clutched his sides and his breath slowly evened out. His breathing was loud but for the most part, he was quiet.

Miyaji acted haughtily and crossed his arms. His fellow upperclassman also made sure to assert some dominance. 'Something you want to share with us, Takao?' Ootsubo asked. That shut Takao straight out and again, he stared off into the distance and was determined to keep quiet.

'Answer us, dammit! Or else I will stuff a pineapple down your throat!' Miyaji screeched.

'Wait, give me a moment. I'm trying to decide my story.' Takao begged, frantic.

'What story? Clearly you met some nice girl, she snuck in here, you snuck in, and you guys had some fun and she left her panties behind. Case closed.' kimura said.

'I wish.' Takao huffed.

He pulled himself to his feet and scowled. 'I wish.' he repeated. The upperclassmen smirked. their patience had paid off. Now they were going to get the full story and then they'll be the ones cacking themselves from laughter; not just Takao.

Takao smiled awkwardly. 'Well, sometimes, truth is stranger than fiction.' he quipped. 'To save a certain Ace-sama's dignity, I'll spare a few of the gory details but those fucking panties belong to our precious Shin-chan.' Takao hiccupped as he spoke and battled a second coming of laughter.

His teammates were stunned. 'No.'

'That can't be.'

'Fuck that.'

Their replies were of disbelief and Takao basked in their reaction because he knew the truth. He knew the gory details. 'Since when does Ace-sama have a girlfriend?' Miyaji asked sourly. He didn't even have a girlfriend so how could tall, dork, and annoying have one. As far as Miyaji knew, the blokes in this room were the only people on the planet who could put up with Midorima.

Takao took another breath. 'He doesn't. he owns them.' Takao explained bluntly.

'No, be serious Takao.' demanded Kimura. Takao faced him with exagerated exasperation.

'I am!' he argued.

'Just do it. Kill us all with your story.' Oostubo said.

'I told Shin-chan I wouldn't...' Takao said.

It wasn't just Shin-chan's dignity on the line here. Takao had some embarassment on the line here as well.

'Sell him out and we'll boost his selfish requests for a week, you will be spared from extra laps, and we'll buy you lunch on Wednesday.'

'Deal.' Takao said way too quickly with almost glistening eyes. That was a deal too sweet to resist. He would sell Shin-chan to Satan on that contract.

Takao shrugged. 'Well,' he began, 'the other day there was this sale on and Shin-chan had me drive him there. Let's just say, shit got real between us. We reached that weird part of bromance where nothing is too TMI 'cause the directions he gave me was to a lingerie shop. Just a small, cloak and dagger boutique exactly for Shin-chan's type. I always like: "This for Mado-chan" and he didn't reply. And shit got weirder from there and we were on a time limit and Shin-chan's, uh, new purchases had to get stuffed hastily in his sports bag. Clearly, they got crumpled up with his uniform and then we got changed today, they fell out. End. Of. Story.' Takao said.

That so was not the end of the story.

However, the upperclassmen accepted it as so and everyone immediately buckled over in laughter. Tears were coming out of eyes and everyone sounded like a circus of hoarse seals. Takao didn't blame them but there was more to that goddamn story which was where his dignity was on line.

Takao dismissed himself from there and tried to consolidate himself. He had gotten a really good deal out of selling out Shin-chan but he couldn't help but feel dread in the bottom of his stomach.

The rest of the story is as follows. It didn't take much brainpower to work out from there that Shin-chan has a massive panty kink. The real reason for the time limit wasn't because his specialty shop was closing, no; it didn't close until three in the morning and they had gotten there at eight in the evening. The time limit was because Shin-chan's parents were usually home by after midnight. Takao had gone home with Shin-chan after that and since they were alone, completely unaffected by personal boundaries, they decided to experiment.

Takao had been the one to wear those panties for Shin-chan's perverted amusement. Although, Takao also got perverted amusement from it because there's nothing quite like flaunting your junk in front of your secret crush whilst the crush was enjoying their kink.

Their experimentation lasted longer than it probably should have because in what felt like no time at all, they heard: "Madoka-chan! Shintaro-kun! We're home! Is Kazunari-kun here as well?"

If there was a world record for how quick it takes to get a pair of panties off and into a hiding spot, Shin-chan and Takao would have broken it as the pair of panties, pink and lacy, ended up in a sports bag and entangled with a basketball uniform. In the heat of the moment, neither could care less about how that ends up.

Takao wished however that they had cared because then he could have avoided being inadvertently kink shamed by the team. Shin-chan was going to pay for this: probably with his pride.


End file.
